Feast your way through Veganuary
Don’t have a cow, man.
How now uneaten cow.
A lot of people love to assume that all vegans MUST be skinny, because honestly, what do they eat? Carrots? Air? *sarcastic laughter fills the internet*
Alas, essentially everything carnivores know and love has a vegan substitute, meaning that the blessed plant-based souls of the world are just as likely to eat their weight’s worth in burgers and fries until they hate themselves.
Here’s our round-up of Brisbane’s juiciest vegan burgers, just in time for tracksuit season.
Where’s the vEEF? Honey it’s at Grassfed, Brisbane’s newest dedicated vegan burger bar. This hole-in-the-wall eatery pumps out some of the thickest, most stacked and sauciest burgs in town, with everything from a humble chick’en schnitzel, lettuce, sriracha and sauerkraut burger to the B.F.C – XL vEEF patty, double cheese, vBacon, fries, shimeji mushroom, tomato, lettuce, caramelised onion, pickle and Grassfed special sauce. You know you want that big boy.
Soak up some sun and buns at VeganBurgz. Not only is this joint BYO (with a bottle shop in the complex and no corkage fee, hello darl), but it serves some lean, green burger machines… quite literally. A lot of VeganBurgz buns are coloured Grinch green (thanks to a natural dose of matcha), with fillings spanning from tofu to “pulled pork” and “beef.” We’re next level suckers for the Fin Free Burgz, stuffed with tempura vegan fish, rocket, onion, tomato, pickled cucumber and chunky house tartare sauce. Time for another dip.
Let’s get this bread. Yavanna’s burgers and sambos menu has the best of all worlds, featuring a pesto schnitzel burger, beef burger, steak sanga, and our personal favourite, the Big Mock with a grilled beef patty, cheese, big mock sauce and shredded lettuce on a warm brioche bun. That’s how to eat pretty in plant-based.
We’ve been to hell and back, and it was delicious. Netherworld’s Hellmouth Diner has a lot of burgs set to play on your palate, pairing each meat substitute with the best flavour combinations possible. Mixing things up a little, Hellmouth Diner offers an all day breakfast burger with a patty, cheese, hash brown, smokey field mushroom and bbq sauce on a soft flour bun, ensuring that you get up on the right side of the bread.
One burger to rule them all. Greenhouse Canteen is 100% vegan, and their only vegan burger is 110% notable. The beetroot burger has a tempura mushroom bun, beetroot and black bean patty, caramelised onion, brie cheese, broccoli puree, sweet potato chips and crispy kale – and we’re not drooling, you are.
What do you call someone that’s asked if you want celery for lunch? Dicki’s is yeeting vegan misconceptions out the window with their classic burger, packed with a house-made mushroom patty, sliced cheese, lettuce, tomato and dill pickles and served with shoestring fries.
Three’s a tasty party. Vege Rama is convenient and crafty, with three vegan burgers ideal for when your office sandwich makes you want to cry. We’re all about the satay burger, with a juicy vegan “chicken” patty, satay peanut sauce, snow pea sprouts, bean sprouts, sliced cabbage and carrot slaw, cucumber and tomatoes, adding an oriental twist to a cheeky chicken burger.
If your meat eating mates or family insist on going somewhere that won’t make them want to gouge their eyes out (because eating plants is so terrifying??) at least convince them to go to Grill’d, Burger Urge, Fritzenberger, Ribs & Burgers, Tippler’s Tap, X Cargo or heck, even Hungry Jacks – all predominantly carnivorous eateries that have done pretty decent job with their token vegan burgers.
The grass is greener wherever there’s plant-based burgers.