That’s The Way the Rookie Crumbles: A Dummy’s Guide to Cheese | Gourmand and Gourmet

That’s The Way the Rookie Crumbles: A Dummy’s Guide to Cheese

  • Food & Booze
As you delve into a tasty curd, you see the ‘cheesepert’ dart from corner to corner. He’s throwing around words like granular, barnyardy and (god forbid) moist. Say what? Some suggest the only thing worth knowing about cheese is how diligently one can stuff it down their cake hole (or in this case, cheese hole). And to an extent, we agree. First off, there are distinct categories of our cheesy friends that you should know about: Fresh cheeses are the babies of the cheese family. They are eaten as soon as they are made and, like babies, are quite simple. They taste predominantly of milk and salt. (Eg. oozy mozzarella.) Semi-soft cheeses are often mild, and aged anywhere between a few days and a couple of months. Soft-ripened cheeses are one of the most loved cheese. They have a flirtatious white (so-called “bloomy”) rind on the outside, which is due to the unique mould that is added to the milk. Surface-ripened cheeses are like doing a yoga class. You think it’ll be super soothing, soft and fuzzy. But once you’re in, you’re hit with an intensity you never imagined. Their special exterior (rind) ensures that the inside ripens fully – ready to pack a tasty punch. Semi-hard cheeses: crumbly and great for melting. Melting your heart because they are so scrumptious. Their flavour varies, but are renown for their complexity and balance. They are typically sweet, but also earthy, not overpowering but also a little tangy. They are the perfect middle child. Hard (aged) cheeses are ideal for grating. They are also perfect for your at-home cheese board. They are generally a little saltier than their friends, and become more sweet and caramel-y with age. (Insert cheesy age-related pick up pun here.) What to serve it with: When it comes to ‘cleansing’ the palate between cheeses, we suggest a generous amount of wine. However, you can also nibble on some water crackers or a piece of fresh pear. Or, wine. The most important thing is to take it slow – let each flavour figure skate on your tastebuds. Eat a cracker to cleanse your palate, and move on to the next cheese. Repeat. For more information on silly cheesewords, have a scan of this amazing cheese glossary. You’re welcome. cheesewheel Brie you soon! Words By Jules